Becoming a part-time gynecologist...

So, I have a friend who used to joke that he was training to be a part-time gynecologist (a Brit, obvs - that little joke would cross a serious line for most Californians I've met). It cracked me up, but, now I'm trying to understand the US medical insurance system I'm seriously tempted to give him a call. At least I would understand his motivations (see more vadge) and I could probably get some 'medical' attention for free.


You see, I thought I understood this medical insurance malarkey - pay through the arse each month to ensure any trips to the doctor, prescriptions and treatment is mostly paid for. All I need to remember is to bring a crisp $10 note with me to pay for the first $10 of the doctor's time (this is what they call 'co-pay') and the insurance pays for the rest. Apparently I was wrong. Different medications appear to be covered to different extents, and some not at all. I was informed that my acne cream (yeah, yeah - 32 year old with acne, sucks to be me) isn't actually covered because of my age, so I would have to pay the full $71 price tag. Exsqueeze me? Baking powder?

Dafuq, guys? Firstly, you want to discriminate against me based on my age? (I'm going to go ahead and assume that its because I'm too young. Shut up.) Secondly - why the hell am I hemorrhaging money out of my butt every month if the first prescription I get isn't covered? And how the fuckety-fuck am I supposed to discern which of my biological disasters are covered and which aren't??

I'm sure there will be plenty of Americans who are surprised (not to say angered) by my stupidity/incredulity/unrealistic demands. But I come from a country where, if I get a prescription from the doctor then it is heavily subsidised by my taxes (and I mean HEAVILY. I worked in a pharmacy for a number of years and we are VERY lucky in the UK. You have no idea how much some of these drugs cost, and we all winge when the price goes up from £6 to £7. Have a word with yerself, Brits). And I was just starting to trust the medical insurance system.

The biggest issue is that America is about choice, so I can choose whether to get insured or not. I can then choose which insurance to get based upon my circumstances. I can then choose the doctor I want to see based on their specialities and where they graduated. I then choose the drug I want, based on a shiny TV advert where the lady runs around with her dogs, smiling, and the voiceover tells me that side-effects could include my legs dropping off, or me developing a belgian accent. The only issue with all of that is that I'm British. Too much choice freaks us out. I am neither doctor, nor lawyer, nor drugs company executive, so I do not pretend to be an expert in any of these fields. I know my place!

I therefore look to these experts and ask them, in their well-informed opinion, what should I do? My suspicion is that all this is bound up with our class system, the 'I know my place' thing from the olden days when you used to go and beg your Bank Manager for a loan. Yes, its archaic, but the alternative is pretty fucking arrogant. Or maybe, I should just become a part-time gynecologist myself?...