Sunday 3 May 2015

I am a sucker for the "exciting new twist", but when that twist is cinnamon I'd rather eat cat litter

I may well have found the array of products on offer a little overwhelming when I first got here. When you just want a box of Frosties its actually quite disconcerting to be faced with a whole supermarket aisle dedicated to types of Frosties. Strawberry flavor? Gluten free? Frosties with chocolate bits? Or Limited Edition blueberry flavor? (QUICK BUY IT!! Its limited edition! Soon it'll be gone forever and you'll be the only person in the world who hasn't tried it! It could be like the very ambrosia of the gods and everyone will be talking about it and you'll have to pretend that you had it, but you didn't, because you hesitated and the limited edition was gone! And you'll know that you missed out on the most delicious breakfast item ever created and it'll haunt you. And they'll all know. And its all because you didn't believe them when they said it was limited edition. LIMITED!! QUIIIICKKK!!)

It is, however, quite easy to get used to these overwhelming food choices. I am currently enjoying a glass of LeBron mix Sprite (lemon, lime and cherry) and Cheeseburger Pringles. Don't judge me. I know I'm a sap for a bit of tv advertising, but it actually makes a trip to the supermarket a bit more fun. Minced beef? Yawn. Wholemeal sliced bread? Meh. But, whats this? Candy's flavored Oreos? Don't mind if I do!

Actually talking of sliced bread, can I use this forum to make a plea to bakers, pizza dough makers and other purveyors of savory dough items? For the love of god, stop putting sugar in stuff. Wholemeal bread shouldn't be sweet. Not everything has to be sweet, k? And cinnamon? Stahp. You put it in fucking everything. Just stahp. If I never tasted cinnamon ever again I'd be ok with that. So, if you're crafting a recipe for a new meatloaf, or a pizza crust and you think, "How much cinnamon should we put in this?", the answer should be none. Err on the side of caution and skip it altogether. Better none than some, that what I alway say.

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